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I Miss My Husband!

I Miss My Husband!


 

“I miss you.”

I say these words to my husband far too often these days. Sure, the man gets home from work around 6 every day, watches TV with me for an hour or so most evenings, and sleeps beside me every night, but it’s not enough. Since having our son 18 months ago, our marriage has changed – in good ways, but also in challenging ways – and our quality time has suffered.

There is one other time in our marriage when this has been a problem – and it was right at the very beginning. We didn’t live together until after we were married, and within weeks of saying “I do” I realised that we were going days without connecting properly. Now that we were finally living together, we were both working on the assumption that we would just see each other all the time at home – which, in theory, freed us up to make lots of individual plans with friends and commitments to other people. But we quickly learnt that living together is not enough, and despite the fact that we were seeing each other regularly, we were not focusing enough on connecting regularly. It was our first lesson on marriage, and luckily we caught it quickly enough to change our habits before we did any damage.

Now with a little human in the Donovan family fold, we’ve fallen into the trap of taking each other for granted again. Don’t get me wrong – we’re fine, we’re happy, we’re very much in love – but still, we miss each other. That connection we’ve enjoyed so easily for over eight years now is a little harder to catch thanks to six o’ clock dinners, bedtime routines, teething, tantrums and toys all over the floor. When we flop down on the couch at the end of the day, it’s not often to spend quality time together – it’s to recover!

Does any of this sound familiar? Do you miss your husband as much as I miss mine? Here are some simple ways that may help you to reconnect.

Really talk

I can go days of building up things that I want to open up about with my husband, but never feel like there’s time to do it. I blame Netflix. Open conversation is so important in marriage though, and shouldn’t be reserved as something that happens once every few days. Go beyond the usual “How was your day?” small talk and delve deeper. Some couples have a set list of probing questions that they ask each other at the end of every day. I find it really beneficial to sit outside in our backyard when I want to have a good conversation with my husband in the evening. Something about the night sky, the lack of distraction and the openness of the space tends to foster our best chats.

Make eye contact

We can let a whole conversation slide by without ever looking someone in the eye these days – whether we’re loading the dishwasher, scrolling through Facebook, getting dressed or wrangling a toddler. Purposefully locking eyes while conversing instantly ups the connection and makes both people feel listened to and valued.

Laugh together

There is something wonderfully bonding about enjoying a laugh with someone – it aligns you for a moment and makes you feel like they just get it. Getting out of the house to enjoy a comedy show might not be the easiest when you’re deep in the throes of parenting, but watching a funny movie at home together (or heck, even dog videos on YouTube) should be equally satisfying.

Snuggle

A lack of physical connection is one of the quickest ways to grow apart from a spouse, so make sure to spend intentional time just holding (and being held by!) each other.

See a counsellor

Though I have not personally gone down the road of marriage counselling before, I have heard many people shouting the praises of a marriage ‘fine-tune’ once in a while, and it makes sense. Sometimes we need help to unpack all of our feelings before we can build our way back to a proper connection. Seeing a marriage counsellor is never a sign of failure – it’s a sign that you care about your marriage, and you want to put measures in place to protect it.

 

Our roles as parents are super important – but so are our roles as husband and wife! At the end of the day, our kids will grow up and leave home… but our spouses are in it for the long haul. Taking constant care of your relationship will help strengthen it and build a connection that will last for years to come.

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STEAM Craft - How to make a Lava Lamp

STEAM Craft - How to make a Lava Lamp

Lava Lamps

Watch gases come to life in liquid and mimic the amazing lava lamps we all love! This experiment is like creating your very own safe and fun chemistry lab and can be completed at home or in the classroom... with adult supervision of course!

What you will need:

Step One - Add colour to your jar

Put a few drops of coloured liquid watercolour in the bottom of your glass jar. Fill your jar a third of the way with water and then sprinkle in some glitter.

Step Two - Add the oil

Top up your jar with oil, filling it almost the whole way.

Step Three - Make the Lava! 

Get ready... Once you drop in the effervescent tablet, the fun will begin! Carefully drop the tablet into the jar – once it hits the coloured water, it will create a gas, pushing the water up through the oil and resembling a lava lamp!

 
 
 
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Simple Beetroot Salad!

Simple Beetroot Salad!

Before Christmas I went looking for a few different salad recipes, we normally do the standard Greek salad and rice salad at holiday events but I really wanted to try something different, I came across this beetroot salad and it was a real hit on Christmas day so thought we would share it.

Ingredients

1 Large tin of Beetroot, not sliced you want it in ball form so it can be diced easily.

1 Cup Walnuts roughly crushed

200 grams crushed Fetta

3 Eggs boiled and sliced in half

Your favourite herbs

1/2 Lemon juice

1 Tablespoon Good quality Olive Oil

 

Method

Dice beetroot into cubes and place on a serving plate.

Sprinkle crushed fetta over the top.

Add the walnuts across the salad evenly.

Place the boiled eggs across the salad scattered.

Add the Lemon juice and olive oil to a cup and then sprinkle  over the salad, it doesn't need to drench the salad just enhance the flavour.

Top with your favourite herbs.

Serves 6 as a side or 2 s a meal.

 

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Christmas Rum balls!

Christmas Rum balls!

Do you have any Christmas traditions at your house? One of ours is to make these glazed Cherry Rum balls. We make them normally around the 23rd of December, then we go and look at the Christmas lights and once home we have 1 or 2 or 3 of these with a cup of tea! What a way to end a night hey?

 

Ingredients

1 Packet Arrowroot Biscuits

395 grams condensed milk

1/2 cup glazed cherries

1/4 cup Cadbury Cocoa

1 tablespoon Rum

1 Cup coconut

Coconut for rolling

1 drop green food dye

1 drop red food dye

 

Method

Pop the cherries in a bowl with the rum and set aside.

Pop the arrowroot biscuits and coconut into a food processor and blitz well.

Add the cocoa and the cherries and run and blitz

add the condensed mil and combine until well mixed.

Add coconut and red dye to a zip lock bag and shake, repeat with the green dye in another bag.

Roll the mixture into approx 1 and 1/2 inch balls.

Mix the red and green coconut together and roll balls in them.

Makes approx 30 balls.

Tip: You don't have to colour the coconut this is something we just do because it is Christmas. if you want them to be more vibrant in colour add more red and green dye. You can also add more run if you like!

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Baileys & Tim Tam Ice cream Slice

Baileys & Tim Tam Ice cream Slice

Ok so this dessert is pretty naughty but since it's the silly season we think the calories can be excused ha! < I have heard if you eat it with your eyes closed that the calories don't go to your hips lol

This dessert is absolute adult indulgence, not only is it delicious but you don't have to share it with the kids due to alcohol in it < win win!

 

Ingredients

1 Litre good quality vanilla ice cream.

1 packet of Tim Tams crushed

250 mils of Baileys

1/2 Block Cadbury Chocolate melted.

 

Method

Line a 30cm tray with baking paper.

Let the ice cream sit out of the freezer until just starting to melt, then pop it into a large mixing bowl.

Add the Baileys and mix with a mix master until just combined, it's important that the ice cream is soft not fully melted.

Add the Tim Tams and stir through, you want it to be quite rustic.

Add the melted chocolate and stir through, you want it to be streaky through the ice cream so you get full on flavour hits, you don't want the ice cream to turn to chocolate, you want chocolate pieces through it. make sure the chocolate is not hot when you pour it in.

Pop mixture onto the tray and press firmly so that each corner is filled and it is levelled.

add another piece of baking paper onto the top and press down, so that it doesn't get icicles on it.

Pop in the freezer and let set for approx 6 hours.

Slice and enjoy!

pour more Bailey's over it if you wish.

Serves 12

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